Guy Against Grub
by waveform
Summary: Ron's Pit Stop Diner is showcased on a TV show about eating challenges.  Yet another look into the future of the Fast Track Universe.


_Disney owns the characters, I'm just putting my own spin on things. This story takes place sixteen years after "Graduation."_

* * *

Dr. Anne Possible couldn't help but think that this sitch was a lot like one well over a decade ago. On that particular New Year's Eve those many years ago Anne, her husband, their children and her daughter's in-laws had gathered at the Possible home to watch a special called _What a Year; _a special her daughter and son-in-law had appeared on. Aside from most of the segment about Kim and Ron, the rest of the show was lackluster to say the least. This show, _Guy Against Grub,_ had already proven to be more than enjoyable, giving the Possibles ideas of places to dine in the fine state of Colorado.

"Hurry, Nana!" a voice from the doorway exclaimed. "Daddy said the show's comin' back on!"

Anne smiled at the little girl who had run into the kitchen. If not for the dirty blonde hair and glasses, Anne would swear that this was her daughter Kim at age six. _Dawn looks so much like her mother,_ Anne said to herself about her granddaughter, _but there is definitely a lot of her dad in there too. _"Would you like to help me with bring out the popcorn, Dawnie?"

"Sure!" little Dawn Stoppable said.

Anne couldn't help but smile. "You know, that's the problem with those food shows. They always make you hungry."

"That's what Mom says too."

Anne and Dawn came back out into the living room bearing the gift of snacks. The Possible House was quite full this night; Kim and Ron Stoppable were there with both of their children, Dean and Dana Stoppable were there, as was their adopted daughter Hana and her boyfriend Joey Lipsky.

"Come on up, Dawnie-Dove," James Possible said, lifting the six year old up onto his lap.

"Can I sit between you and Gramps instead, Grandpa?" the little girl asked. "I'll even share my popcorn with you." Both family patriarchs grinned at that.

"Of course you can, Dawn," Dean smiled. Both men had a special bond with their granddaughter.

"I think it's starting up again," the nearly ten year old Ronald "RJ" Stoppable, Jr. said. The youngest redhead hit the volume on the remote in time for the commercials to end.

"Today, _Guy Against Grub _is in Upperton, Colorado to take on the Unstoppable Super Spicy Challenge!" a deep voiced man announced. The picture changed to an exterior shot of the Pit Stop Diner, with a dark haired man with a strong Brooklyn accent standing at the front door. This was Alan Richter, host of _Guy Against Grub. _"For people in the Tri-City area, the Pit Stop is a chunk of local history. Come on, let's go in and check it out."

Alan walked in the front door, giving the camera a full view of that very familiar dining area. "The Pit Stop Diner was originally opened in 1953 by Doug and Patty Pit. They ran the place for thirty years, until they retired in 1984. After that, the diner closed down and remained nothing more than an unused building. Had it not been for the Upperton Historical Society holding the deed, and their refusal to sell to anyone who wanted to tear the old diner down, the Pit Stop's story would be long since over." The camera zoomed in on Ron Stoppable working the flattop. "Then this man, Ron Stoppable, came along and brought the Pit Stop back from the dead."

"So tell me, Ron," Alan said, "how did you come to the decision to reopen the Pit Stop?"

"It's Daddy!" Dawn happily squealed.

"And here I thought I was your number one fan, Bro," Hana giggled.

Ron Stoppable grinned from ear to ear. "That's me; inspiration to offspring and younger siblings!"

"Don't forget godsons," Joey added.

"Booyah!" That made Ron's grin bigger. _Who would've ever thought that the son of Drakken and Shego would not only remember my name, but say I'm an inspiration? For that matter, who would've thought I'd let that same kid date my baby sister?_

"Well," the Ron Stoppable on TV, proudly wearing his Pit Stop Diner t-shirt, said, "I'd been driving by it on my way to work for years. The day I was let go from my last cooking job I decided I was gonna be my own boss. So I talked to my dad and my wife, and we got the ball rolling to buy the Pit Stop and fix the place up!"

"And fix it up he did," Alan continued in narration. "He replaced all the fixtures, updated the kitchen, and brought the entire building up to current fire code, all the while keeping the decoration scheme that the Pit family first used all those years ago." The view changed to a sweeping shot of the dining room. "And the place has been packed ever since. Some of that is due to the menu.

"The Pit Stop serves the usual staples like burgers and hot dogs, pizza, and tacos, but it also serves a wide array of specialty items." The camera zoomed in on something the Possible family had been familiar with for years. "Like this cerebral cortex shaped concoction called Mrs. Dr. P's Brainloaf. There's also the Rufus Special; an extra cheesy one pound burrito with half a pound of cheese drenched nachos! For those with a smaller appetite, there's the Booyah Burrito. And for those adventurous hot dog eaters out there, you can get your franks covered in marshmallows by asking for them Kim Style.

"The unique and delicious food keeps people coming back for more, as does the fact that the diner is almost the same as it was originally. The only difference being in the dining room where there are several display cases showing the exploits of teen hero Kim Possible. And there's a very good reason for that."

The picture changed to a shot of Ron standing in front of one of the display cases in the dining room. In that case was a photo of Ron, Kim and their late pet Rufus. "Does this guy look familiar? Well he should! In his teenage years, Ron Stoppable was part of the world saving Team Possible, although most people only remember Kim Possible. These days Kim Possible is known as Kim Stoppable, and she and Ron are half the reason that I'm here today; in more ways than one."

Alan was standing with Kim and Ron in the dining room in front of a display case showing a mannequin wearing the mission gear Kim started wearing in her senior year of high school. "I finally have the chance to thank you guys," Alan said. "I was working my first food industry job on Diablo Night at a Bueno Nacho in Brooklyn. We had one of those all night drive through windows, and I was on duty when the Li'l Diablo toys did their giant robot thing. Thanks to you guys, I'm still here."

"It was no big, Alan," the Kim Stoppable in TV said.

"I hate to disagree with a hero, Kim," Alan countered, "but to the guy whose life was saved by what you two did, it was big. A huge big. A major big! I'm still breathing because of you guys. Now whether or not I'm still breathing after I take the Unstoppable Challenge, that's another story!"

"Well, you're braver than I am, Alan," Kim laughed.

"Braver than most of us, Aunt Kim," Joey Lipsky said with a shudder. "I don't think I could do that."

"Speak for yourself, Joey!" RJ said excitedly. "I can't wait to try it."

"When you're older, RJ," Kim said calmly. "Those release forms customers have to sign to eat that stuff isn't for show."

"Follow me, Alan," the Ron on TV laughed. "Let me show you what you're up against!"

"The Unstoppable Super Spicy Challenge consists of a two pound Unstoppable Burrito, covered in and cooked with Shego Sauce; the hottest hot sauce known to man." Alan help up a cup of the greenish liquid; a liquid that looked like it was giving off steam. "This stuff is so hot, and the burrito so big, that only one person has ever completed the challenge. Ron Stoppable himself. So tell me, Ron, why did you come up with this stuff in the first place?"

"Hot sauce just wasn't hot enough," Ron said nonchalantly.

"Says the man with the reinforced titanium stomach," the Kim on TV laughed.

"Okay, so you decided to make your own super hot hot sauce," Alan continued. "What's in it?"

"Well, the exact recipe is a trade secret, but I can tell you that it has jalapenos, ghost chiles, and wasabi."

Alan's eyes bugged out of his head. "Jalapenos, ghost chiles, and wasabi? What, do you hate people, or something? That could burn through the sun! Ghost chiles are the hottest chlies known to man, so why did you need the wasabi?"

"For color," was the reply. "It can't be called Shego Sauce unless it's green!"

That got a laugh from everyone in the living room.

"Okay, but I have to know what your lovely wife thinks about you naming your hot sauce after a former enemy," Alan said, looking at Kim.

"If you've ever been hit by one of Shego's plasma blasts, you'd know the answer to that," Kim replied. "Hotter than anything I've ever felt before."

"And Shego's okay with it, so we're good," Ron added. "Since her son is dating my baby sister, we have an inside track!"

That comment made Joey and Hana cuddle into each other more than they already were.

"Besides, we think our son has a crush on her daughter," Kim said with a sly grin.

"Moooooom," RJ moaned. "Why did you have to say that? Now everyone at school is gonna be after me about it!"

"RJ and Lisa sittin' in a tree," Dawn sang. "K-I-S-S-I-N-G!"

"If you know what's good for you, runt, you'll stop that!" TJ snapped.

"Kids," Kim said, going into "Mom Mission Mode." A glance was all it took.

On TV, the preparation was continuing. "Ron cooks up the ground beef and the beans, mixing in doses of Shego Sauce as he goes. This is gonna be one hot plate!"

Alan watched with trepidation as Ron mixid the super hot sauce into the beef. "So not only is the sauce on the burrito, it's also in the burrito."

"That's right," Ron replied. "Give it an even heat, y'know?"

"And how many people have taken this challenge and failed?"

"Three dozen just this month, I think."

"Three dozen this month?" Alan looked straight into the camera. "This does not bode well for me."

The voice over started again as the camera zoomed in on a now completed Unstoppable Burrito that Ron was putting a final glaze of Shego Sauce on. "If only one person has ever been able to eat a full mega hot Unstoppable Burrito in the entire two year history of the Unstoppable Challenge, then I have my work cut out for me."

As the show went to commercial, Dana Stoppable started to scold her son. "I can't believe you let that nice man eat that stuff!"

"He wanted to do it, Mom," Ron protested in his own defense.

"And that's what Alan Richter does, Grammy," RJ added. "He goes to different places all over the country and takes eating challenges. Sometimes he wins, sometimes he loses. But he keeps doing it."

"I have to say," James Possible said, "as far as show folk go, he seems okay."

"He was more than okay, Dad," Kim smiled. "He was a total pro the entire time he was in the diner. He wouldn't even ask for an autograph until they were done filming. And," she snuggled into her husband, "he never got Ron's name wrong once during the entire shoot."

"Definitely a plus," Hana said.

"I'm in Upperton Colorado's Pit Stop Diner to take on the Unstoppable Super Spicy Challenge!" Alan said in narration when the show came back on. "If I win, I'll get my picture on the Wall of Fame, get an 'I'm Unstoppable' t-shirt, and my meal will be free! I'll also be the first person, other than challenge creator Ron Stoppable, to ever eat an entire Shego Sauce infused Unstoppable Burrito! Let's see how I do."

The picture changed to the dining room of the Pit Stop Diner, filled with cheering patrons who Alan exchanged high fives with until he came to his seat. Ron Stoppable followed, carrying the two pound burrito, steaming from the heat of both the sauce, and the fact that it was freshly cooked. "Okay, Alan," Ron said. "There's no time limit on this, and you can have all the whole milk and ice cream you need to dull the heat. You have to eat the whole thing in order to win. But first," Ron pulled out a clip board and pen. "You need to sign the waiver."

"When you have to sign a legal form to eat a spicy meal, you know it's beyond hot!" Alan quickly read and signed the form. "Okay. Lets do this!" Alan cut into the burrito as the crowd began to cheer his name even louder. His eyes nearly bugged out of his head upon taking the first bite.

"That first bite was like biting into a solar flare," Alan said in narration. "It's so hot that I'm not sure I can take any more."

"It's like I ate a hot coal," Alan said as he wiped the pouring sweat off his face. "I can feel every cell in my mouth crying out in pain."

"But amazingly, I can still taste the seasoned ground beef, and that incredible flavor is calling to me, inviting me to take another bite. I gulp down some milk, and go for it again, taking a bigger bite this time in the hope that I can eat it quickly."

"You're a cruel man, Ronald," James said to his son-in-law. "I know you were picked on a lot growing up, but still!"

"Please remember that he did this voluntarily," Ron protested. "And a lot of people do this every week! I've even done it!"

"I've seen people lined up to take this challenge, James," Anne said. "They bring it upon themselves."

"I'm not even a quarter of the way through this burrito when I consider throwing in the towel," the narration continued. "But then the cheers of the crowd filter through the Shego Sauce induced haze."

"Alan! Alan! Alan!" the crowd chanted over and over again.

"Even Ron is there to give me support."

"You've got this, Alan!" Ron cheered. "Your picture is gonna be up there next to mine. You're unstoppable, buddy! Unstoppable!" Ron and Alan share a fist bump, and Alan dives back in.

"With renewed purpose, I start to really devour that burrito, focusing on the tanginess of the beef instead of the searing heat of the sauce. Before I know it, I've gone through two more quarters of the burrito. But that last quarter is looming large on my horizon, like some Diablo Robot sized menace." Alan wipes more of the sweat and tears from his face and looks like he's about to give up when Kim comes up beside him.

"You've got this, Alan!" she said, before giving him a peck on the cheek. He perked up immediately.

"Ah the power of a KP Kiss," Ron said philosophically. "There's nothing that they can't do."

"Getting a kiss from Kim Stoppable recharges my batteries, and I plow through the rest of the burrito. Before long, I'm staring my last bite in the face."

With the last morsel on his fork, Alan stood and addressed the crowd. "In the immortal battle that is _Guy Against Grub, _the spicy challenges are often the most difficult. But here, in the Pit Stop Diner in beautiful Upperton, Colorado," Alan trailed off and let the home crowd cheer, "here, amongst true heroes, I can truly say that this battle goes to the guy!" With that, Alan ate the last piece to thunderous applause.

Ron Stoppable, wearing a huge lopsided grin, came out with the first ever "I'm Unstoppable" t-shirt he had ever awarded. "Alan my friend, you truly earned this!"

Alan held the shirt up, presenting it like it was the fabled Golden Fleece. The cheers from the audience were nearly overpowering.

Anne Possible picked up the remote and muted the sound. "He's a very brave man."

"Really nice, too," Dawn said. "He sat down and talked to me and RJ a lot when we were all there."

"Definitely someone I'm glad won the challenge," Ron smiled. "It was getting lonely on the Wall of Fame."

"Just wait, Dad," RJ said. "One of these days I'll be up there too! Father and Son sharing food glory!"

Ron mussed his eldest child's hair. "And that, RJ, will be the bondigettiest!"

* * *

_Author's note: The character of Alan Richter was based on Adam Richman, the host of Travel Channel's _Man vs Food; _a show I credit with helping me get my appetite back after I had surgery._


End file.
